Found these two items in a local store here in Columbia, Sc

A Friend sent me this!

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"

A FIREMAN came home from work one day and told his wife, "You
know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station:

BELL 1 rings and we all put on our jackets,

BELL 2 rings and we all slide down the pole,

BELL 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go .
"From now on when I say BELL 1"
I want you to strip naked.
"When I say BELL 2"
I want you to jump in bed.
"And when I say BELL 3"
We are going to make love all night.
The next night he came home from work and yelled

"BELL 1" The wife promptly took all her clothes off.
When he yelled "BELL 2", the wife jumped into bed.
When he yelled "BELL 3" , they began making passionate love.
After a few minutes the wife yelled

"BELL 4" "What the hell is "BELL 4" asked the husband?
"ROLL OUT MORE HOSE," she replied " YOU'RE NO WHERE NEAR THE
FIRE."

From: Ace Marketer
Sent: 1/20/2008 9:48:03 AM

Beer contains female hormones

Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women. To test the theory, 100 men drank 8 pints of beer each within a 1 hour period. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:
1) Argued over nothing.
2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.
3) Gained weight.
4) Talked excessively without making sense.
5) Became overly emotional.
6) Couldn't drive.
7) Failed to think rationally.
8) Had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary.